There is a saying, "what we resist persists", but take that with a grain of salt...

We also know now that resistance is what shows up when our protective parts are working to do exactly that: protect us. Our resistance can be a protective armor we have worn for a long long time, and while we may no longer need its protection in the present, those parts might not know they can take off the armor (yet). And that is perfectly okay. My invitation for you in this practice (this entire course) is not to override or push past your resistance, but to HONOR IT. My colleague, Noah Kloze likes to say: "Honor the armor".

Resistance can also be a very beautiful and pleasurable energy in its own right. If we can dial in to how it is serving us (see practices below) we can start to be in choice about how we employ the superpower of resistance.

Resistance to feeling pleasure is also a very common phenomenon - in fact, I want to zoom out and remember our entire capitalist racist patriarchal sexist ableist system is built on resisting pleasure. I'm sure you can imagine a whole lot of reasons why our society has been resistant to pleasure for so long.

In short, pleasure is powerful. It involves you making choices FOR YOU and not for someone else.

You might have a huge pile of feelings that live under your resistance, including grief, shame, anger, resentment, numbness, AND even joy, pleasure, gratitude, and love. Feel these things as you feel safe enough, at your own pace, and time.

Below are some guides for working with resistance, honoring it, and perhaps even welcoming it.

Questions to ask yourself when you feel resistance

You might journal or meditate on these questions. You might pick one or several to work with. Use them as an on-going practice as it feels okay enough for you.

• What am I afraid would happen if this resistance wasn't here?
• How is this resistance serving me?
• Who would I be or how would I feel without this resistance?
• Is there any part of this resistance that feels pleasurable?

Becoming Curious About Your Resistance - A Practice

You might enter into a little dialog with your resistance to get to know it better. This practice is not meant to change your resistance, but to find compassion for it, which might be another way of changing our relationship to it. If you feel you can be curious about your resistance, this is a good practice to try. Read through the instructions so you have an idea of where you are going. You can also record yourself reading the instructions (slowly) and play them back. You can do this exercise imperfectly and still get something out of it.

Start by sitting or laying down comfortably. Try a body scan or some gentle breathing to ground and center yourself.

Acknowledge: See: where does your resistance live in your body? Or if you can already feel it, see if you can become curious about its shape, texture, color, sound, or movement. You can use your imagination to 'see' your resistance. Then, acknowledge it with your words. You might say, "I see you." or "I feel your constriction." or "I sense you are very alive." Whatever feels authentic.

Allow: Feel what you feel. Is there an emotion or a movement your body is desiring? Can you allow for this resistance to take up some space? Notice what you notice.

Ask: You may see what your resistance would have you know by asking: What wisdom do you have to tell me? You can listen for the response. You might hear words or receive images, colors, impulses. You can also listen by noticing what you sense or feel. An option here is to also respond back. You might offer some kind words or reassurance back. For instance: "I hear your frustration." or "You don't have to change."

Just noticing with compassionate awareness.

Appreciate: When you feel complete, perhaps after a few minutes or so, move towards an authentic appreciation of yourself, your resistance, your experience or your body. It might be something simple like “thank you for showing up” or “I’m glad to get to know you a bit more” or "thank you for protecting me." Saying only what feels authentic.

Integration: Ending with a self-hug or patting of your arms or legs, gentle stretches or movement, or perhaps your own version of savoring as it feels right.