"Gender can have a lot to do with sex—gender can be
one of your best sex toys ever." - Kate Bornstein, author and gender theorist.

Whether you are sure of your gender identity and expression, or you're on a life long path of exploring the full spectrum, this prompt is sure to reveal some interesting ways to play with yourself.

The Invitation:

This is FOR YOU. Sometimes its nice to set up for a date or get ready, we might light candles or put on a sexy outfit. Sometimes we might dress up to 'feel sexy' for our partner's fantasies or arousal. Sometimes we are enacting another person's idea instead of our core erotic expression. Consider, what would you wear if you could inhabit any possible gender expression? Think broadly: does your gender expression (today) feel best adorned in lace, leather, make-up, boxers, thongs, gauze, fur, metal, silk? Or a combination of some? Do you want to highlight a body part with a strappy accessory? Or hide away another part with some tight fitting clothing? Consider your body a work of art.

Now how do you engage your genitals? Do they have a name you prefer? What might they need to feel fully seen and turned-on? Do you want to wear a harness and dildo or tuck away some parts? Or perhaps there is something else: a starfish, a flower, a fruit you like to imagine your genitals as...

What toys feel like an appropriate accessory for today's gender expression? These cute little fuckers are a great inspiration for gender inclusive toys. I also love these grinder toys as another way to imagine solo sex for any body.

What does it look like to celebrate this version of you?

Reflections:

What beliefs do you hold about your gender? How do they serve you?

What does it feel like to consider a gender expression other than how you show up in your day to day life?